"My orgasm is brightly colored and shatters in geometric shapes!"
When I eat my favorite food - Spaghetti Bolognese - it tastes light green and round to me. It's always like that. My little daughter is purple (well, that's a lot of little daughters), but with me she will never outgrow this color. As long as I can remember, my life is full of colors and shapes. The 7 is blue with me, a cool dip in the lake orange and pentagonal. It's been like that forever. It was only five years ago that I understood that my perception does not conform to the norm. I was already grown up there. Just as the others can not imagine my colorful life, for me it is a crazy idea to live without my colors and shapes. I wonder what life feels like when tones are just notes and taste is just on the tongue.
Synesthesia is not imagination
I have heard many times that people think I am crazy. When I spoke of my perception, many looked at me as if I had just said that I could see my ancestors and talk to daisies. There are quite a lot of us. Since many are ashamed of their ability or at least afraid of the reactions, there is a large number of unreported cases. How many of us exist? No idea. The estimates are very different. Some researchers speak of a quota of 1: 25,000. Others even say that one in 1,000 is synesthet. Incidentally, the scientific explanation for synaesthesia is that sensory impressions mingle with us. Sounds, tastes and feelings always have an optical component with us. For some also an acoustic.
Luckily I have a very open circle of friends. They perceive my gift rather interested than suspicious. They ask me what color they have for me and how their favorite song sounds to me. Once a friend asked me what an orgasm looks like. It only became clear to me how different our worlds are. What should an orgasm look like, if not colorful and consisting of thousands of small geometric shapes?
What is normal?
Sometimes I would like to be completely normal. Being special is sometimes a bit lonely. While others may just ask, "How do you like the yellow of my coat?" All alone, I have to enjoy the beautiful yellow of the wind. But two years ago something very nice happened. My little daughter said to me, "A is blue, foggy, and doing laundry." Even though my A does not wash, it felt wonderful to have another little synesthet in my family. And I'm happy for her that she has a mom who understands what she says. And this does not only affect people like me. Of course, everyone sometimes feels alone with their special abilities, and I'm sure: Anything special can anyone. I believe that there is a great deal between heaven and earth, which only a few of us understand. I may see more colors and shapes, but others feel very different things. Maybe even everyone takes everything completely different and we just do not know it. I am always happy when I meet someone who sees the world differently from me. I do not think it's a good idea to label everything that is unknown to you as crazy.
