3 tricks on how children learn to wait

Those who are patient as children will most likely succeed in their lives more successfully. This long-term studies have long been proven, as a prime example is the marshmallow test.

Now probably only a few mothers joyfully cry out and refer to their sweet-sweet child with his angelic patience. In fact, it seems to be a book with seven seals on how to teach a child patience (especially if you do not have much of it in your own pocket).

Yet, the wait is quite a learnable skill to which almost every child is capable. However, it also depends on age: on average, can

an approx. 1.5 years old child wait about 30 seconds.
on 2.5 years old child wait about two minutes.
on 3 to 5 years old child wait approx. 15 minutes.

More than that, you do not have to expect a (small) child.

With these 3 tricks, your child learns to wait:

1. How children learn to wait: Talk to the child!

Yes, can that be so easy? And how! Between the ages of 6 months and 1.5 years, the child already reacts to Mama's voice.

Imagine, your child sleeps peacefully in bed, and you want to take advantage of the hour to shower quickly, wash your hair or just hang the laundry in peace. Suddenly your child starts to scream. What you are doing?

Most mothers would rush to the baby immediately. Some exhausted mothers would make the child scream without comment. And as so often, the right behavior is in the golden mean!

Experts advise to answer the baby immediately? but not to stop everything immediately and run to it. Toddlers may not yet understand every word you speak. But they recognize voice (mum), voice (soothing) and sentence melody (friendly).

Alone the voice calms the child, because it knows: I hear Mama, she is there and will come soon. At the same time, the baby has a chance to self-regulate.

So many experts advise the mothers: "Trust your instinct!" It also means: Of course, it depends on the reason why the baby is crying. If there is a fever or hunger, you should of course leave as little as possible to wait. If it's just boring, can it wait a bit longer? a few minutes depending on the age. It is important to talk to the child during the absence. Words can do wonders? even with babies!

2. How to make children wait: Offer alternatives to your child!

When children learn to crawl, walk, and climb, they naturally want to apply their newly acquired knowledge. Are you embarking on the big wide world? the apartment? and touch everything that does not rivet? and nagelfest is: glasses, sockets, plants and Co.

Who stands by and constantly a "No!" repeated, often gets the first small tantrums of the children to feel. No wonder, after all that's pretty frustrating to be kept from exploring!

Experts advise parents to observe the child during the exploration tour and not always a "No!" rauszuhauen, but also to offer alternatives. As soon as the child grabs the precious vase, Mama can offer the tot an alternative, directing his attention to something else: maybe a book that's nearby (and less fragile than the vase)? Or a toy that is at hand?

Once the child does what Mom wants, it should be praised. Basically applies to children, men and animals: eulogies work better than punishments!

3. How to make children wait: to promise a reward!

The child get used to routines is half the battle. This includes e.g. sitting at the dining table until the rest of the family is full. How do you teach this to a child (preferably from the age of 3)?

At this age, children understand short, clear messages. They understand explanations such as "We all stay at the table because it's nice to sit together and chat." Of course, you should include the child in an existing conversation, so that it does not get bored.

If that does not work out right away, you can certainly lure the child with a reward: "If you stay still, you'll get a dessert!" Or "When we're all done, we can play together." Many children alone are convinced of the prospect of a reward (which, of course, parents must adhere to in order to gain or strengthen the child's trust).

P.S .: Who has tried all this and his child is still an impatient joker, should not despair: In part, patience is also a matter of genes ...