Marriage truth: "We only work"
We were married for 14 years when our marriage got into trouble. My husband is a long-distance driver, ten years older than me and the opposite of my lively nature. For many, we are the ideal combination of redheaded / bustling and distinguished gray eminence. He was the man I looked up to and had respect and respect for, I loved him. All these years I had managed the kids, the household, my job, and my husband's personal affairs, keeping R.'s back free to do his job well.
R. came home from a big local folk festival at breakfast time with the wrong face. Since then, small imperceptible signs piled up. Never in my life would I have thought that my husband was cheating on me. It took ten weeks for the signs to be obvious even to me and I confronted him with my suspicions over the phone. He admitted that he had fallen in love and that he would leave me.
She needs him, it is a matter of the heart to him and he will be there for her and her three children (sometimes still in kindergarten age) and for this time take to see her grow up. He also wanted to have a child with her (my husband was 50 at the time!), He would see to it that her husband, who was beating her, would move out, and financially support her wherever possible.
He decides to stay - and the psychoterror begins
I had my personal record by the weekend, which included a seven-point plan on how to dissolve our marriage peacefully and amicably; I do not want dirty clothes and no shouting and if he wants to go, I can not stop him.
He was pleasantly surprised by my reaction - but apparently it had changed his mind in the past few days: he did not want to leave. I should please help him out of this affair. So I supported him, because now she started to terrorize us. Constantly SMS came from her (even on my phone) on the phone were her children, who asked for R. Suicide threats and a pregnancy were announced to us, she patrolled in front of our house and put us notes under the windshield wipers.
So it went for weeks, we changed our mobile numbers, applied for a landline secret number, it was useless, the psycho terror went on. So long, until I threatened her with the police and with them to blacken her at the youth welfare office, because she neglected her children and drove them drunk around.
We do not have much to talk about anymore
Internally I went from these days on distance. The whole thing he had himself einrockt, I was no longer responsible. I started to change in many ways. My self esteem was down, my health was damaged. I would have understood if this woman had been more beautiful, educated, financially independent than me - she was not. A fat bitch with about a hundred pounds, no job, no perspective, with simple but unpredictable mind! But she had awakened the protective instinct in my husband, which I no longer triggered with him.
Since then, years have passed, love, respect, trust has evaporated from our marriage, we just work and do not have much to say. But to the outside we are still the harmonious couple, who only sees himself at the weekend, but still understands well after 20 years of marriage.
