The 10 most common childhood fears? and how to approach them

Each of us was once a child. And each one of us was a lot more anxious as a child than we are today as an adult. Fears are naturally desirable, they protect us from dangers such as falling from a high cliff, running in front of a car, burning at the campfire, being attacked by a stranger or drowning in the sea? to name just a few obvious examples.

Every childhood brings with it certain fears that are adapted to the respective stages of development. After all, children of all ages are learning and discovering something new, trying on themselves, expanding their abilities.

For example, a one-year-old child crawls away from mom for the first time to explore the environment, but soon after, grabs the fear of loss and returns to mama crying. The same applies to the two-year-old child, who is left alone in the day care center for the first time and may cry at first. At the end of the day, the grief is blown away as it has experienced so many new things. The fear disappears, the positive experience remains. The same applies to the beginning of school, puberty, the first day in the sports club.

The 10 most common childhood fears

Fear in the dark
separation anxiety
Fear of loss of love
Fear of monsters / burglars
Fear of animals
Fear of water
Fear of mistakes
Fear of illness / death
Fear of independence
Fear of doctors

Many fears disappear on their own again: Because the children develop further, get used to situations, learn to handle dangers. However, children often need support from their parents or older siblings to deal with anxiety. As a parent, helping children overcome their fears:

1. Signal proximity to the child

Parents can not "take away" a child's fear, as it is often said. But they can help the child and respond appropriately to their fears. Parents help their child by teaching them to deal with their fears themselves, thus giving them the tools to fight their fears on their own rather than acting on behalf of the children.

This includes providing the child with security, such as tender hugs, undivided attention and open conversation.

2. Respond to the fears

Children's fears must be taken seriously by parents. If a child feels that mom and dad are not "fending off" their fears, they soon feel misunderstood and left alone with their fears.

It is better to sympathize with even the most absurd fears of the child and listen carefully to the child.

3. Process anxiety situations

Painting, kneading, role-playing games: If you play with your child the situation of anxiety, it helps him to overcome anxiety scenarios in his head.

To paint a picture, how to scare away the wardrobe monster, knead a burglar and then crush him, play a wild animal that is expelled by the child? All this can help the child to imagine possible defensive situations and thus overcome the fear.

4. To serve as a role model

"When I was the same age as you, I was also afraid of monsters under the bed ..." Who signals to his child that his fears can be fully understood, serves as a role model for his child. If you then show the child that he has overcome his fear, the child is confident that his fear is finally over.

"If mom is not afraid, then I'm not afraid anymore," would be the optimal way of thinking of the child. Parents serve their child as a great role model, the little ones strive to become like them? fearless in this case.

5. Get professional help after major events

A death in the family, separation of parents, serious illnesses or accidental accidents can traumatize children. Even children who have been abused or beaten can be traumatized.

In such cases, many parents ask themselves how they can help the child process the fears that have arisen. especially as such events can even traumatize adults. Here it often helps to seek professional help, e.g. with a family therapist. Many institutions, such as hospitals or hospices, also provide social workers who specialize in caring for those affected and their relatives.