Life
May 5, 2024

Yanti? a very special girl traveling

Before Fabian and Nico became parents, they were never in one place for very long. Travel was one of them. First everyone for themselves, then together. Their destinations were not 5-star resorts in Turkey or the Costa Brava, but especially places that are beyond their own comfort zone, including dangerous animals and hygiene problems. When Nico became pregnant, Fabian and she wondered a lot about whether this kind of traveling would be possible with a child. They were sure, with a few security measures that would have to work. They did not know then that Yanti would be born with a chromosome anomaly.

Condolences to the birth

In the book "With different eyes, how I learned through my daughter to see the world anew" Fabian describes painfully honestly his first thoughts after the realization: Yanti has the Down syndrome. "In retrospect, I'm glad we did not know that before we were born," he says today. "We had worried too much." And they had enough worries even after Yantis birth, because breathing was difficult for the little one from the beginning. Then came the outside reaction. I know that nobody wanted us to do any harm and I do not want to blame anyone, but it was still hard because we had a baby and only a few responded with carefree joy . " So they decided to make a very special birth announcement. They photographed Yanti in a superhero pose and wrote a humorous text: "Hello, my name is Yanti, better known under my superhero pseudonym," Q90 "- also called Down Syndrome - along with my partners Wanderwoman and Journeyman - which happens to be mine too As a "chromosome crew," parents are prejudice, bigotry, and spoilsport - my secret weapon is a stunning smile, beware, you villains! "

"We are happy with this child"

With this card, Fabian and Nico wanted to send the world an important message: "We are happy with this child because of a chromosome, we love our daughter no less!" From that moment came the congratulations. "Stranger always scares you once," says Fabian. "I think it helped our environment so much that we positioned ourselves so clearly that it made them nervous about saying something wrong and from that moment everyone could be happy with us." Fabian knows that not all parents of children with disabilities consistently receive such positive reactions. Some mothers and fathers have told him bad things. "Such a thing does not have to be these days anymore" [1] or? Prenatal test and abort? Problem solved! Such people only cost a lot of money for society without ever repaying it? are just example sentences of many that parents have to face.

90% of children with trisomy 21 are aborted

Fabian and Nico began to delve deeper into Down syndrome. They read a lot, sometimes terrible things. "One day I looked at various statistics and now I know that 90% of children diagnosed with trisomy 21 in the womb are aborted in Germany, which is legally allowed until their birth." Immediately afterwards Fabian found another statistic. "According to a US study, 99% of people with Down syndrome are happy, 97% like themselves and do not want to live without Down's syndrome, 96% think they're good looking." By comparison, just 31% of the North American population are happy with their lives. "These two statistics side by side are downright paradoxical," says Fabian thoughtfully. "That just does not fit together!"

"I respect the woman's right to her body"

Anyone who thinks that Fabian Sixtus Körner is an anti-abortionist is wrong. "I fully respect the woman's right to choose her body," he says. "I disagree with the current legal distinction between disabled and non-disabled children." In general, he lacks in the German public positive examples of a good life with the Down syndrome. "Integration is not as successful as it is in other countries, and in many southern European countries or in Japan, there are even people with Down's syndrome who have a university degree because they are treated differently from the start." Many Germans, he says, would find the word inclusion really great, until the concept is actually realized in their own environment. Then it quickly comes to the fear that one's own interests or those of one's own child could be neglected, even if the needs of a person with disabilities must be taken into account. "That's a shame," adds Fabian Sixtus Körner."Because people who are different can be incredibly enriching."

Yanti traveling

Fabian and Nico wanted to set a good example and not be stopped from integrating Yanti as normal in their family. That meant traveling. "The nice thing was: nobody wanted to stop us, the doctors talked us all good," says Fabian. So Nico and he searched out good clinics, made contingency plans and headed for the Caribbean. "What happened then was unbelievable: Yanti has made huge leaps in development, and her breathing has become more stable by the sea," says Fabian.

The journey was followed by more. "You can not think of it as a long-term vacation," says Fabian. "We work quite normally when we're on the road, and often have tight deadlines, which can sometimes be quite exhausting and adventurous with a child."

He and Nico are not completely fearless either. "Of course, fear plays such a role in such trips with us," he says. "We have a great responsibility, as do all parents, and of course we take them seriously, so we never travel without knowing exactly where we are in good hands in an emergency." Thinking about all this is important, but fear should never gain the upper hand and stop one from living. "

"I'm just thankful"

Fabian does not think people would be happier if everyone lived like him. He also knows how privileged he is to be able to do his job from anywhere in the world. There is nothing missionary about his statements. "With the book, I did not want to advise everyone to go abroad and show their children the world, which is not so easy for many and indeed not for everyone," he says. "I think my message is a lot simpler, I just wanted to tell the world

Very much. We are happy. With exactly this child as it is. "