Why we ALL become like our parents!
An example: Recently we flew on vacation. I blew them out of bed so early in an exaggerated good mood, crammed them with cereal and then gotten into the taxi that we were at the gate two hours before departure. TWO HOURS!!! And then I said that awful sentence that I had to listen to for decades from my father: "It's nice, if you do not always come at the last minute, now we can still have a coffee." Hello? Am I still completely comforted?
But that's not all: In the meantime, I am one of those people who check three times, whether they really have packed the concert tickets or the plane tickets. And who, before they go out the door, look again quickly, if the stove is really off. Bad, right?
I used to be quite casual. Really! Jumped into the train just before the doors closed and thought a toothbrush and a slipper would be enough as vacation luggage. When did I just become this philistine?
Psychologists say my behavior is normal. The brain is an old habit animal. It ensures that we automatically adopt certain behaviors without thinking about it. The ones that our parents used to serve us. They stuck like thick trails in our brains, and we unconsciously pick them out whenever we get into a similar situation.
And that's mostly in adulthood. Then we start raising our children similarly ("We just want your best," as I've already said) to share the same political outlook (in the last three elections I actually have the cross in the same place as my mother set (or set) the style of driving ("You have to drive ahead," I've had to listen to my father for years.) Today I know that's not the worst thing of all.
But there is hope. Even as bad habitual offenders as I can change their behavior. The first step in the right direction: to recognize the automatisms. So I'm on the right track. Maybe then I'll make it on the next family vacation, just 90 minutes before being at the gate. Or even 60? Well, that would be a bit crazy now. One should not overdo it.
Incidentally, long-term studies also show that certain personality traits generally change over the course of life. As we get older, we become more conscientious and emotionally more stable. So I'm not alone. It makes me feel a little better.
