Sex in pregnancy - so it gets really nice!

The test strip is positive, the joy big - a baby! Every woman knows that the moment when it is clear "I am pregnant" changes everything. Life planning, leisure activities - and also sex. The stomach gets bigger, maybe there is nausea and suddenly you are confronted with questions like: Can I still sleep with my boyfriend? Do only certain positions go? Is sex ban in the ninth month?

Gabriele Aigner (48) is a certified systemic single, couple and sex therapist (IFW) in Munich. www.aigner-praxis.de

The systemic single, couple and sex therapist Gabriele Aigner advises singles and couples in matters of sex - including expectant parents. "Of course, a pregnancy fundamentally changes the relationship," says the expert. "How much depends on many factors: For example, did both have the desire to have children or is one of them overwhelmed? Does the couple know each other for a long time and does a stable partnership or is the baby right at the beginning?" Then, a couple can move away from each other bit by bit - even in a sexual sense: "Depending on how open a couple has talked about his sexuality before, there can be a lot of misunderstanding during pregnancy "says the expert.

With the growing babybump joy, worry and doubt can arise. The classic: he has inhibitions to penetrate his girlfriend - after all, his child is in her stomach. He may ask: Can I hurt the child? And does my partner enjoy baby bumpers?

Good sex is a matter of the head

Gabriele Aigner knows: "Sex is always a matter of the head - that's why ignorance and fears can stand in the way of pleasure during pregnancy." Just as he may be afraid of harming the child or the woman, for example, she may feel unattractive with baby bumps or stretch marks. The key to most problems: "As expectant parents should be both early go to the gynecologist or gynecologist together and talk about worries and doubts. There, the couple learns about and answers to exactly these and other questions. "It's also important for both to share their thoughts and fears, such as learning how to trust his partner to tell him when something hurts or unpleasant.

Sex in pregnancy can be even better!

Many say: Having sex with a baby bump - that must be difficult. In fact, some pregnant women may feel even more lust during sex. "Especially in the second trimester of pregnancy" says the expert. "Because the pelvis is well supplied with blood." That the women in the first third (nausea, hormone changes ...) and in the last third (full stomach, full bladder ...) less desire to have sex, is quite normal.

What both partners should make clear again and again: Pregnancy is not a disease! Although some baby-belly positions are no longer comfortable, the expert reassured, "If the woman is healthy and has not had a miscarriage or bleeding, there are basically no taboos."

The best sex positions in pregnancy

The expert advises: "Super work the riding position or the doggy style ". If the woman finds penetration during pregnancy less good, oral sex is a good alternative. Even sextoys are okay and do not harm the child - of course they must be disinfected.

Everything is different after birth

As big as the transition is already in pregnancy - after birth, life is completely turned upside down. "The newly-minted mother concentrates completely on the child, perhaps retiring several times a day to breastfeed. The partner steps into the background " says Aigner. If the couple starts to get intimate again, the man may still be inhibited by the experiences of childbirth. "Thoughts like" May I put my baby in there? "Can get in the way of pleasure. It often takes a while to until everything has settled down again - that is quite normal. "Generally, it is important to cultivate tenderness and sexuality, because that connects and does good!"

By the way: Whether before or after the birth date or during pregnancy - every woman should go regularly to the gynecologist check!

Sex during pregnancy: love threes

We too have sought medical advice - and the Doctor and adviser Maren Weidner from "Pro Familia" asked some questions about sex in pregnancy.

ChroniquesDuVasteMonde.com: Can a woman have sex during pregnancy?

Maren Weidner: Yes. All forms of sexuality - penetration into the vagina, but also oral and anal intercourse - are in a normal pregnancy without hesitation.

Even until shortly before birth?

Generally, yes. Of course, sexual intercourse in the missionary position - the woman lying down, the man above - is rather difficult for anatomical reasons towards the end of the pregnancy.

What does a child in the womb get from the parents' sex?

You do not know that exactly. You can measure the heartbeats of the embryo, and they seem to increase after an orgasm of the mother. This is not harmful.

Which venereal diseases are dangerous for the embryo?

Mushrooms are annoying but not dangerous. Bacterial infections should definitely be treated because they can ascend into the uterus. Warts and other symptoms that are the result of human papilloma viruses are quite common. Such warts can also lead to infections of the child and must be treated.

Is it actually harmful for the embryo if a woman continues to take the pill, for example, because she does not realize that she is pregnant?

No, that does not lead to harm to the child.

Is it true that sperm contain substances that can cause contractions?

Yes that's true. Also the orgasm of the woman can in rare cases cause labor, because it leads to contractions of the uterus. But in a normal pregnancy there is no risk during sex. Only if it comes to premature labor, a couple should be careful. Even women who had multiple abortions should refrain from sexual intercourse in the first three months of pregnancy. Because in the first three months, the risk of miscarriage is particularly high.

When may couples have sex again after birth?

As long as the weekly flow lasts, sexual intercourse should be avoided. The uterus has not yet regressed during the week's flow, the possible episiotomy has not healed yet. In these first six to eight weeks after birth, the penetration is usually no pleasure for the woman. Women should just wait until they feel like it again.

What exactly is the weekly flow?

It is a wound secretion from the uterus.

When must the couple again prevent after birth?

Right at the first sexual intercourse. Although the mother is likely to get pregnant again every four hours, every four hours, around the clock, there is little chance of her getting pregnant. But breastfeeding is never a hundred percent sure contraceptive.

Can the mother take the pill again immediately?

While breastfeeding, she should not take any combination of estrogen and progestin - just pure progestin pills. Because progestin is only in the smallest amounts in the breast milk and is therefore not harmful.

How long does it take for the vagina to be as tight as it was before birth?

The vagina is not exhausted after birth. But the pelvic floor muscles take six to eight weeks to get tight again. For this, the woman should attend a post-natal class, paid by the health insurance.

Do orgasms feel different after birth?

In principle no. However, the body sensation can change quite generally, and it can - indirectly - also benefit the sexual satisfaction.

5 Surprising Reasons Why Sex During Pregnancy Is Good (May 2024).