Humid? Lesbian? So what!

Christel von Winterfeld, 74, two sons, Großburgwedel near Hanover: "I was horrified and my son was so sorry" One day, shortly before leaving school, Christoph came back very disturbed from the bike ride with a friend. He confessed to us that he had fallen in love with these classmates. How will the boy handle this? And what will people say? These were my first thoughts. Our environment is very conservative, the Winterfelds are an old Prussian officer family. My husband and I then sent Christoph to a psychotherapist. He was so upset and we probably hoped that he could be "healed".



Today I get really angry when I hear something like that. Homosexuality is not a disease! But it took time for us to face the fact that our son is gay. We had to accept it because we did not want to lose it. Christoph gave us books and sent us to a parent group. Then we went on the offensive: I founded with other relatives Befah, the Federation of Parents, Friends and relatives of homosexuals. There I learned to speak openly about my gay son. That helped me alot. Later, I advised other parents on the back phone. I sent books about homosexuality to our relatives. Nobody reacted. The topic continues to be very difficult in the family. Most still do not accept that Christoph is gay. Before parties are pointed out to him that he should not bring his friend.



Christoph von Winterfeld, age 44, architect, Berlin: "In my family, I had learned: being gay does not belong, is disgusting." My mother and I came much closer because of my coming out. Before we had polite contact, now we can talk about our feelings. That was a long way, though. After I had told my parents that I am in love with my school friend, we have not talked about the subject for years. They hoped it was "just a phase". I myself struggled a lot with my time. Because being gay completely contradicted the values ​​of our national conservative noble world. Everything I had heard about homosexuality had been disgusting. And I was convinced that I was somehow "wrong". At the beginning of 20, I read an article about a gay in the "Zeit". This broke the knot, because if it was reported in such a respectable magazine positive - then it had to be alright. The story was in Hamburg, I went there head over heels. When I saw how many gays there are, it was very frightening for me. I clearly told my parents that I am homosexual.

That's what I call today "my second coming out". This time, I was more confident. And my parents reacted quite differently than the first time. Maybe they wanted to make amends that they had hushed the subject for so long. My mother was active in the Befah, the national association of parents, friends and relatives of homosexuals, she even went along on Christopher Street Day in Cologne. Sometimes I was almost embarrassed by such actionism. But basically I love how much she wanted to help me.



Annette Borggräfe, 59, two daughters, a son, elementary school teacher, Hirschberg an der Bergstraße: "When I met her friend, I felt: that fits" No grandchildren! No nice son-in-law! These thoughts flashed through my mind as I started to read the book on homosexuality I had bought shortly after my daughter's outing. I started to cry and asked myself: Did I, did we do something wrong? Is it up to education? A few days earlier, Julia had told my husband and me on the phone that she was with a woman. At that time, she was 25. Until then, homosexuality had virtually not occurred in my world. The only gay man I knew was my hairdresser.

I come from the Rhineland, so from a deep Catholic area. There we grew up with the idea that same-sex love is something unnatural. That was one side. On the other hand, I am very curious about everything foreign. That was also the case for Julia's girlfriend. When I saw them together, I thought: That suits! I had often wondered which man could be the right one for my daughter. Even as a child she was very boyish. For me, the idea is still very strange to have a love affair with a woman. But for Julia it's just the right way of life. She is now married to a woman and very happy. That's the most important thing. Today I think that Julia is lesbian, so was laid out in her. And I do not have to worry about grandchildren either: I already have a granddaughter, two are on the way - one of them with Julia and her wife.

Julia Borggräfe, 34, lawyer, Berlin: "My parents had less problems with the fact that I love a woman than myself" Klick did it when I saw "Claire of the Moon" in my early 20s. The film tells the love story of two women and has totally fascinated me. After that, I fought with myself for a few more years, until I could admit that I'm a lesbian. I grew up with very clear, more conservative values. It just did not fit into my image of being with a woman. But at some point, I was at a point where I had to make a decision.

The first time I kissed a woman, it was a whole new dimension, and I never wanted to go back. Everyone else had far less problems with my homosexuality than I did myself - including my parents. Actually, I expected them to be really crazy. The first shock my mother probably overcome when she met my then girlfriend. Now suddenly there was a person in front of her whom she found sympathetic and with whom she could speak well. Thus, the theoretical concerns were first off the table. Recently she told me that love movies with men and women can not really be that exciting for me. I love how she thinks. It is more difficult when it comes to questions such as: Are gays and lesbians allowed to have children? May the holy marriage be opened for her? We have discussed this fiercely - today my mother is more open.

Kirstin Fussan, 46, a son, employee of the Senatsjugendverwaltung, Berlin: "First Nico went out and then I. He's gay, I'm a lesbian" Nico is gay, I'm a lesbian. And we were out in the space of only half a year. Nico made the beginning, he was 14 at the time. When he told me, I was completely stunned, my heart was pounding like crazy. But a shock? No. Homosexuality was part of my life. I had a lot to do with gays and lesbians, and there were always homosexuals among my friends. Nevertheless, I was worried at first. Because of HIV for example. That's why we talked a lot about safe sex. I trust Nico, but that still smolders in the back of my mind. At the time, I also feared he might be bullied at school. Luckily that did not happen. And Nico went happier again after his coming out. Before that, he had been very introverted.

I'm glad he was out so early and did not have to torture himself forever. For me, the process took longer. When Nico told me he was gay, I was already in the middle of it. But I needed my time. It was very difficult for me to leave my then husband, Nicos stepfather. I put my feelings aside for a long time. Nico loved it when I was with my girlfriend Sabine. He felt better understood by me. And his relationship with the stepfather had been difficult. Then Sabine moved in with us. At the time I have very nice memories: It was a real "women's household" with us three, we were free and happy.

Nico Fussan, 25, Event Technician, Berlin: "Even as a child I knew that I am different." I need a man !, I simply gave my mother a forty-four at the time. Since her lesbian colleague Sabine had just said the same thing about a woman and gave me a great template. I had not thought long before how to teach my mother. Because I was sure that she would not have a problem with a homosexual son. First, she is very tolerant. Second, I knew that she loves me and always keeps me. For me, too, the realization that I'm gay was easier to work with than many others. Even as a child I knew that I am different. At puberty, I discovered that there is a word for it: gay. The thought did not really scare me.

When my mother knew, fantasy became reality. She sent me to a gay and lesbian youth group and opened a new world for me. I suddenly had contact with other gays and got to know my first friend there. I was 14, he 23. Some time later, my mother told me that she was leaving my stepfather and was now with Sabine - the colleague, who was indirectly involved in my coming out. I thought that was great. As a gay boy, I had a lesbian mother now! And she was obviously very happy with Sabine. Today the two are married.

Hot Lesbian Kissing Part 7 (March 2024).



Homosexuality, Berlin, Julia, Hanover, Hamburg, Christopher Street Day, Cologne, homosexuality